Over the last few months I have read little of mainstream news and more worrying, have written less socio-political commentary. My lack of zeal for the tasks of keeping up to date with the travails of the struggle has caused me concern – have I been assimilated into the apathethic framework that is modern democracy? Have the ‘distractions’ of modern living hijacked my energies and reduced me to yet another bill paying ,tv watching social zombie?
The silence – aka absence of comment – has not been an easy one, my response to events over the last few months have been larconic at best. It is not that my humanity is not stirred by news of atrocities in Darfur or the incalculable suffering of the Acholi in Uganda or , indeed, the hostages in Iraq; but lately I seemed drained of emotion to power my commentary. Anger and frustration at the political systems that permit such injustices are the pen and ink of my writing, these have not been absent over the last few months. Simply put, they have been tempered with a defeatist acceptance that I cannot effect change.
My realisation that I can resign myself to such defeatism sits uneasily at my side, mocking every effort I have made, thus far, to focus my potent anger. So now, I write for my Realisation, that to accept resignation is a path I cannot walk.
Perhaps there is nothing I can do, maybe that is the reality – even if it was, I would choose to be ignorant of this truth and continue to rage against those unacceptables that hurt my sensibilities and my humanity. Defiant ignorance must suffice where the truth of the moment is untenable with my principles.
Whilst a Warrior of Light must sometimes retreat to advance, He must never accept defeat.
He must battle however He can, but always with honour and integrity.
Though He must rest and renew Himself, He must never give up.
My capacity to wade enencumbered, through the lies of the powerful and the sacrifice of truth and innocence at the alter of statehood, has admittedly been temporarily diminished by Darfur, Iraq and other human disasters. My ability to fight on all fronts has been reduced too, by personal issues. But I will be renewed. I will regain my strength and my form. My anger will be blended with knowledge and forged in the wisdom of the collective and I will do more than I have done.
Silence, uneasy as it is for me, is not permanent. When my shouting recommences, it will be deafening and persistent and it will stay the slow course of change.