Category: Wellbeing

  • Why You Might Need To Hire Differently To Fix Your Broken Company

    By: West Vancouver ArchivesCC BY 2.0

    Recently I’ve been working on an experiment to learn how to help companies improve by working with them remotely. This experience inspired me to write about broken companies, where you can get a better idea of what I mean by ‘broken’.

    The difficulty I find most often in working with companies trying to improve themselves is that a new conversation needs to be started and it is often a difficult conversation to have. It is difficult for three major reasons:

    1. An organisation and its management have to acknowledge that there are problems that they cannot fix on their own. Acknowledging this can be a big deal – especially in companies that have a rich history of blame for things perceived as failure.
    2. Few –  if any –  of the people who need to be in the conversation have ever experienced being open-heartedly asked to join and take part fully in the conversation – at least not in a way that makes it OK to say ‘No’.
    3. Few –  if any – of the people in the organisation, know or have experience of facilitating this particular type of conversation.

    Most employees were not hired to help improve companies.

    Almost every company I have known in over 20 years of my working life has hired almost exclusively for function and competence at function – they hire people to do the job they want doing. In this regard people serve a functional purpose, just as a telephone serves a functional purpose, or a stapler serves a function. Yet human beings are so much more than simply functional resources.

    So people join companies primarily to do what they were hired to do – not explicitly invited to take part in the continuous improvement of the company, themselves and each other. As people move from job to job, the invitation is never made. Until one day they get to a company that does make the explicit invitation and they have no idea how to do contribute to help make things better.

    Continuous improvement of the sort that I believe in – where we are individually and collectively focused on improving both our product (and services) and each other in the process takes people who care. It is not the kind of continuous improvement that is mandated from above. The input about what needs fixing comes from the same people who will play a key part in fixing it – everyone. I’ve often heard this referred to as ‘bottom up’. I do not agree with this – because it implies that in this approach there is still a ‘top’. In fact there is no hierarchy when we have this conversation – we are all equal partners, albeit with different responsibilities.

    I once invited a group of developers in a company to a brown bag session to explore what things they thought needed improvement and what capabilities they thought might enhance their effectiveness. As the invitation went out, I got responses from a number people who said they weren’t interested. One in particular elaborated on why he wasn’t interested. This email created such an impression on me that I saved the most relevant quote. Which I share with you now.

    We are here to code this software and we have too much to do – I’m not fucking interested in helping anyone else to get things better – that is what we have managers for , isn’t it?

    I often wonder how many of the people I have met in the companies I have worked with who feel this way but never say it, but act on it nevertheless. How many work in your company?

    Now I also wonder how many of those same people would have applied for the jobs if they had been explicitly invited to help the company continuously improve – not through some bullshit HR feedback system – but through full participation and ownership of both the problems and the solutions. How many would be willing to take the empowerment that was offered and seek sustainable improvements through collaboration? How many would in your company?

    Invitation? But joining in improvements is implied, isn’t it?

    Often when I talk to groups about why an explicit invitation is essential, I often get people who roll their eyes and say “but it’s kind of implied, isn’t it?”. Of course, it is reasonable to assume it is implied if we are ourselves readily do it. Expecting of others what we do naturally is common human behaviour. It is also one of the commonest ways we inflict violence on ourselves and others. By expecting that others will behave in the way we think is implied often results in disappointment which often leads to judgements – ‘they are incompetent, they are selfish, they are <insert your moral judgement here>’.

    I feel pretty strongly about this and see a strong analogy with  date rape.

    A guy invites a girl out for dinner, a movie and some drinks – maybe even coffee. After the date, she drops him at his place and he invites her up for ‘coffee’. Is sex implied with coffee? What happens if the girl doesn’t recognise that implication and actually has no intention to have sex with the guy? For her, the invitation to coffee was exactly for a beverage. What happen if she says ‘No’? Whilst this situation may not always end in rape, one has to wonder what moral judgements emerge as a result, what coercion was applied, what suffering caused?

    All this because an explicit invitation wasn’t made.

    I deeply believe that whatever is risked by making an explicit invitation to join a mutually beneficial activity is returned several times over by the explicit buy-in and commitment that those who say ‘Yes’ give back.

    Hire differently

    I believe that it is a form of violence to demand people to do something they had no explicit knowledge they would be asked to do and then, if they do it ineffectively, to chastise them. Yet I see this happen often. The chastisement is not often overt, but it is present nonetheless.

    This is why I think all organisations that are committed to developing the habits and behaviours of continuous improvement need to fundamentally redesign how they hire, to explicitly include the invitation – not demand – to prospective employees to participate fully in  continuous improvement.

    Redesigning how hiring is done is actually the tail end of a longer chain of redesigning activities and attitudinal shifts.

    To make the invite, the company has to figure out what continuous improvement means for them – this is the start of the internal invitation. The makers of the invitation – usually management – need to discover what a ‘openhearted invitation’ means and be comfortable enough to make one.

    Then the invitation itself needs to be figured out.
    If it is too vague, it risks being irrelevant.
    If it is too rigid it risks being perceived as a demand and as coercive.
    If it is just right, it is easier to have the conversation and demonstrates to the prospective employee that your company is worth taking a risk on.

    Are you involved in continuous organisational improvement in your company, I’d love to hear your experiences. Please comment or tweet me: @mhsutton

    Why I Wrote This

    I wrote this because my mission is for the world  – including and especially the world of work – to be full of JOY.

    I wrote this because I wish for the people who work in broken companies to see value and a potential for JOY in joining with others to improve their companies and I want them to realise this potential.

    I wrote this because most of the time, I see that a huge amount of misery, frustration and anger could have been avoided by a few open-hearted invitations and conversations and I want to help companies start to have those conversations.

    You can help spread JOY in the world by sharing this. Thank you

  • FUALMO – The life lesson you won't find on Oprah.

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    2013 has been an amazing year on many accounts. Most notable of these is that my family and I moved to Spain, marking a new and beautiful chapter in an already charmed family life.

    Also, 2013 represents the first 12 months of searching for a viable startup business through experimentation – well, almost 12 months.

    This brings me to FUALMO.

    Fuck Ups are inevitable.

    This year has seen me fuck up repeatedly. Mostly with my startup and with my relationship with Katharine – my wife, my partner, my BFF, my ideas bouncer – basically my everything rolled into one beautiful package.

    Being absolutely focused on my startups has meant being all consumed by it and being all-affected by what I am experiencing as I build things – the disappointments and the joys (actually there have been far more of the former and too few of the latter – but hey ho!).

    I’ve been moody, snappy, inattentive, intolerant and lost in my own thoughts. I have overburdened her, taken her amazing resilience for granted, communicated poorly and generally been a grumpy ass for a good part of the year.

    Apologise –  as soon as it’s safe to do so.

    One of my enduring strengths is my ability to reflect – almost immediately – on my behaviour. It has often been difficult but I have also learnt to apologise sincerely for my contribution to disharmony.

    I used to apologise simply to keep the peace – without really thinking deeply about what it meant to me and to the other person – hey don’t judge me!

    But now I tend to apologise with an added description of what I am apologising for. I find it helps me fully understand what I consider the damage I may have done and  knowing I need to do this helps me really think about how the other person feels.

    Thankfully Katharine helps this by being open to my apology and providing an insight into how my behavior affected her.

    Learn – otherwise what is the point?

    Every fuck up is an invitation to understand what need was unmet and to learn more about myself. One huge learning that I made this year was that I a lot of my behavior is down to a need to not be interrupted in thought. I think deeply about stuff. This year has been mostly about startups, what my passion is and home cinemas (yeah – who knew!). But through reflection and analysis of my behavior I learned that I resented being interrupted when I was deep in thought about something. It rarely matters what the interruption – from being called to supper or being invited to a family walk.

    Now that I know this is a need I have, I can communicate it and find ways to accommodate it in a more effective and harmonious way.

    The difference between failure and truly fucking up is learning. I leave you to figure out which way it works.

    Move On – because no one should take that much abuse.

    Finally what has really helped me this year has been my improving ability to move on from a fuck up. Some fuck ups have been bigger than others and the time it takes for me to move on from them has varied but, almost without exception, I have been about to get closure on a fuck up.

    I am convinced that the steps leading to moving on are critical to being able to just let things go. Without sincere apology, I cannot learn deeply and without learning (and the actions they lead to) I cannot see how I could really move on.

    Moving on is essential to my mental and emotional well-being. Without it, things boil and bubble, fury simmers – waiting for the next spark to turn into an explosion. I am lucky that I can recognise when I haven’t moved on – because the new irritation has something to connect to. But through more reflection and sometimes conversation with Katharine I am able to move on from the fuck up.

    So whilst this might never make it to Oprah and I’m certainly no Dr Phil – I hope you will consider FUALMO as a sanity-preserving technique to cope with real life. It works for me and it might work for you. Even if you totally ignore everything else I have shared, please consider finding effective ways to move on from behaviors that you do not feel proud off.

    Here’s to a 2014 of many failures and fewer fuck ups.

  • My Routine

    I’ve had a few different routines over the last few months, but this one seems to have nailed it. I’m done tweaking it now and at least for the next few months, I think I can live with this. Hope this inspires someone.

    At the start of the year, I decided what was important to me (aside from my family) and was determined to focus on them. I picked 3 things: Work, wellness and speaking Spanish. As the months have gone by, I have extended those to include playing the saxophone and worked that into my routine. A little practice everyday goes a long long way.

    By the way, the (F) means it’s a ‘fast’ day – where I do a limited fast – typically only having two meals and not exceeding 600 kcals for the entire day. It’s working quite well. I feel healthier and less bloaty (though the reduction in bread is probably helping with that).

    Also ‘lunch’ is generally spent hanging out with my sons when they get back from school.

    routine

    Stand and Deliver

    One of my prized possessions is my sit/stand desk. I stand most of the day – typically more than I sit. I have definitely found this much more comfortable over the course of the day compared to sitting. I have a greater range of movements too and experienced a lot less back pain that I used to have. Although I have no data to back this up, I think standing has helped me be more productive.

    Time for Work

    Typically I end up doing about 36 hours of work a week – and it turns out to be really productive because I have made time for the things I also want to do more of. So I’m really at work for those hours. My focus has always been working smarter not necessary longer hours. One of the benefits of working from Spain (but not in Spain) is that I’m an hour ahead of the UK, so when I start my day at 9.30CET, I’m still ahead of the UK typical hours by 30 minutes – so if I have to chat with folk first thing in the morning, it is not too much of an issue.

    Time for Play

    I tend to dart into my social media platforms all through the day – it has been quite distracting – so this time, I built in 15 minutes between each slot to catch up on tweets and interesting posts to read. Between this and using queuing apps like Buffer, I seem to be doing OK. Also knowing I have made time to workout (that is what HIIT represents – High Intensity Interval Training), do some spanish lessons (with duolingo.com) and practice on my saxophone – my brain does not agitate and give in easily to distractions. Aside for the odd nap!

    Flexibility

    I tend to stick to my schedule fairly strictly – at least for the early days – but there is always room to be flexible. For example , my wife has a lunch date and I can easily swap my half-day on Friday to a Wednesday. Other times if I really need to play the sax to get a tune out of my head and just jam, then I’ll do that and adjust that day accordingly. Oh and let’s not forget the beach. Gotta go to the beach.

    Also I try to be in bed and asleep by midnight and back up at 7:30 – ish. Might do some reading but mostly that just sends me to sleep!


    What is important to you in your daily life and how do you make time for it? Would love to hear about your routine, please tweet me or comment below.


  • Getting Sweaty – My First Bikram Yoga Experience.

    Q: How do you take a 3000 year art form, freely practiced by millions and turn it into something new,  proprietary and lucrative?

    A: Simplify it and add heat exhaustion.

    I love food. Not in a pig-like ‘swimming in food’ indulgent way, I enjoy the pleasure of cooking, eating and socialising around food. Food has always been easy, I’m one of those people who throws stuff together and it tastes yummy.  I learned this from my mama.

    Exercise, on the other hand has always been hard. Even the stuff I like doing like aikido or spinning or weight circuits have been truly labours of love.

    Recently I turned to yoga as a way of staying flexible,  keeping fit in body and mind – I travel a lot and yoga seemed like the thing that I could do anywhere.  Specifically I do vinyasa style yoga which, through a mixture of movement and breath control, helps you get sweaty and your heart rate up.  The discipline to maintain posture and balance is something that seems to get better over time.

    Well, when I say sweaty – I really mean ‘moderately’ perspiring. ‘Sweaty’ needs to be redefined when you start doing Bikram yoga.

    Bikram is a style that involves 26 postures (fairly basic ones) each done twice. Each practice sessions consists of working through the postures over a 90 minute period.

    Oh yeah, and you do this in 105F (40+ celsius!) degree heat.  If the numbers are confusing, lets just say that is hot – very hot.

    Sweaty does not begin to describe how much water leaves your body during a bikram session. In fact you sweat so much, you need to bring 3 towels.  One to lay on your mat during the session to soak up the sweat and prevent from slipping and sliding all over the place – even with a yoga mat.  Then you need one for actually soaking the sweat off your brow,  your hands, ankles, shins and pretty much anywhere you need to grip to actually do a posture.

    Once you’re done in the class and with both these towels now totally soaked, you need the third for a much needed shower.

     

    Beyond Sweat

    Prior to this class, the longest single yoga session I had done was an hour – without added hat exhaustion.  So, it was no surprise that by 45 minutes into the session I was totally exhausted (mostly from the heat though),  I quickly got beyond the sweatiness and into the postures – most are quite simple (even if my current dimensions and inflexibility prevent me from achieving them).  The heat does add a little something to the mix.  I found I was able to stretch much easier (whether this was because of my increased blood flow or the lightheadedness – I dunno)

     

    Stick to The Drill

    The instructor is a Cuban emigré galled Daniel – a really nice dude.  He knows what the postures should look like, he’s great at explaining and demonstrating how to do them effectively to get the designed benefit.  But I think there is a script that he has mastered  as we work through the 26 postures.  I guess when you run 4 – 5 classes a day, you get a script.

    Daniel doesn’t do the session with the class though, he literally instructs it. I guess when you run so many sessions a day, you can’t really physically afford to do every one.

    All in all I would do Bikram regularly. The studio had a 30 day trial deal for €50 and I will use as much of that as I can , beyond that it gets a little pricey and I may just do it four times a month in addition to my daily vinyasa practice.

     

    Would I recommend it?  Absolutely! 

     

    Thanks for reading 🙂  Have you tried Bikram yoga? What do you enjoy about it?