I love the people I chat with on Skype. Most are irreverent and simply don’t take life too seriously. Well, actually they take a small bit of life very seriously.
It was my friend Tommy’s birthday and I skyped him to wish him well (to be honest I was prompted by Skype – a feature I have loved forever!).
You may know him from such twitter profiles as @kode4food – where he plays a grouchy, irreverent developer/maker.
Here is the transcript. Hope you cry laughing 😉
It’s Tommy’s birthday today
Forgot the birthday card? We can help – send them a Skype Gift Card instead.
Hapy Birfday to you, Happy Birfday to you, Happy Birfday dear Tommy, Happy Birfday to you. Hip Hip Surgery!
What you got planned?
well.. my wife (soon to be) bought me a nice tobacco pipe.. I figured I’d smoke that a little bit, then have some indian food, then come back and smoke a little more. it’s a bit rainy today, so not much else can be done
I figure now that i’m 41 and I’ve spent most of my life playing it safe, it’s time to throw caution to the wind and start smoking
dude – thats is stupid idea
not like I’ll be a chain smoker, it’s a fucking pipe after all
dude – its a fucking filthy habit
I’m a filthy filthy man
you always think its cool, but its filthy
its like walking around with dried turd on your underpants filthy
not 90 year old man fucking a 21 year old hottie filthy
easy to confuse I know
who says I don’t already walk around with dried turd in my shorts?
but your clothes will stink like an ashtray and your wife (soon to be) will stop kissing you
nah, she won’t
and your pseudo kids will learn that you don’t respect yourself, not really
and will subliminally not respect you, all because papa hittin the old man pipe
I think they already know that
god, if they only knew me in my twenties
you will be such a conformist when you smoke this, you will join the ranks of the can’t think for themselves
I smoked weed like a chimney from the time I got home til the time I went to bed
weed is an exception when you have brain cells to burn, dude you are on a downward spiral now re: brain cells
comformists smoke pipes?
you need the ones you have to help you keep from being incontinent and drooling uncontrollably
a 41 year old who can’t control his own bowel movements, well that is just wrong.
yes – conformists smoke pipes. , fucking conformists
honestly, I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone smoke a pipe… like ever
dude – clearly you are hellbent on doing this
so do it
I tried cigars, but they’re a pain in the ass
and then stop doing it
BTW you’re not supposed to smoke cigars with your ass (it is a great party trick though)
I once saw this woman in Bangkok smoke a cigar with her pussy
somethings you can’t unsee.
I’m going to put this conversation on my blog by the way
it is fucking class.
I will change names to protect the innocent.
then you don’t even want to know about my heroin overdose suicide pact
I think I’d like to see the Bangkok trick
just to say I saw it
yes, please do
Samsung says I should buy a Galaxy Note 10 for Mom
what’s the address of this here blog you’re gonna write?
i will post the link once I have it – it’s one of those cheap market tricks where you don;t get to see what you;re buying. I always wanted to pull one of those scams, so now I will. With a blog post (how fucking lame!)
I hope you enjoyed it for the crass, uncensored but thoroughly hilarious skit it is. If not, thanks for dropping by – you might want to check out Prudes Anonymous while you’re about.